The Excuse

"You wont be the person you are in the years to come and I wont be who I am today...so what’s the whole point of it???"

i know You are there

In my resilience I observe,I wonder and life makes me realize that something is there..
Something that watches over me…someone on my side
Someone still giving me a chance
Someone who knows my story and its end
Someone who knows me and believes in me even when my self belief ends…catching me every time I fall.

the druggie

12.46am,Sunday.
He was so fucking beautiful, unearthly
God I wish i could bring him home,
God I wish I could take care of him,
His face…hauntingly beautiful…sunken eyes circled by grey…red lips…black hair…mauve shirt..on the electric blue bike…
He was so beautiful, so perfect and what he had done to himself was shaming everything..
I saw him and was so caught by him..
I wanted to scream and cry at the same time…but all I could muster was silence…
He was crippling my soul with his sad empty eyes…
It wasn’t cold yet something had frozen me…
The pain, the cold made me look away…
I wanted to know his story, I wanted to tell him it wasn’t his fault..
His eyes spoke of a soul raped and bloody..something about him gave me goosebumps…something in him scared me..something in him gave me a glimpse of hell…
And I know I won’t see him ever again but if I do I’ll tell him…
Courage is to live…

Playing With Food

we were having noodles in the college canteen when a noodle slipped from my friends fork and naturally made the alphabet 's' on the table..she laughed as it is the initial of her ex-crush..i had my share of fun when i tampered with it and curled it into an 'm' initial of a guy she particularly dislikes.

Questions better left alone

It’s me living a postponed life which keeps getting even more postponed each day, busy doing nothing , tired from doing nothing, nobody broke my heart but I'm still so heartbroken, I try to simplify things but in the end land up complicating them even more, I try every way of being happy and land up being depressed even more, my brain is asleep and I can’t figure a way to wake it up.

Inside me trapped is this crowd of people, for one nothings good enough, for the other, there are no expectations from me anymore and is so sure that I am meant to fail, In between them is a voice that tells me every moment to get out, to run away, from everywhere, from everything, to quit, as nothing is worth it. There’s this person who hates guys and convinces me that the only way I can be happy and peaceful is by spending my life alone, and then there’s this person dying to fall in love and convincing me that love is the solution to all my problems. Sometimes, I wish I could get rid of this crowd but no matter where I go they are all within me and they never shut up.

Why I'm such an extreme person, why can’t I even consider the middle paths of the world. Why do I think so much about the stupid things in life? Why do I fear so much? Why don’t I think rationally? Why do I feel so intensely? Why can’t I ever stick to a plan? Why am I so repulsive towards discipline? What am I trying to prove by screwing my own life? Where did this anger come from and why does it only self destruct? Why can’t I grow up and stop writing stupid stuff like this??