You are yet another dose of dopamine that wears out leaving me colder than before. As I pop pills like tic tacs in the single digit temperatures of the night I wonder if I know anything for sure anymore. You, me and this.. A beautiful firework that fades into nothing but ashes and smoke and I like a little kid still stare at the velvet blue sky,wishing I had made you some breakfast the last time.

                                            
                          And if I am abusing too much, and not being creative about their use...know that, what I really need to do is have a good cry.

If dolls could talk...and teddy bears could sing....

they'd tell you I wasn't always like this.....how easily I'd laugh and cry.....

they'd tell you I loved to talk...teach them stuff and tell them stories....

they'd tell you how patient I was....I'd put each one of them to sleep....

they'd tell you how I took care...patched them up...made clothes for them....brushed their hair

they'd tell you how worried I'd be when others played rough with them.....

they'd tell you I was never scared of the dark, the thunder,the spiders or the monsters.....just the teacher in school who would shout to bring me back from the day dreaming.....

If dolls could talk...and teddy bears could sing....

they'd tell tell you who I am.....not who I seem to be.

..in plastic and fur....recycled...or in the dust....

lie my purest kisses and caresses... tears for nothings..

 ...misgivings of a tender heart.